Eternal investment?

So, in my need to be honest and transparent.... I'll just say it's been one of those mornings!

It's 12:10PM and I'm still in my pajamas!!!! agh! I've been up since 6, so you'd think that somewhere in there I could've gotten dressed, but not so.

Titus woke only minutes after he went down for his morning nap, so out went any hope of getting things done... :0 Well, not really... Guess it all depends on what my goal is. Of course I'd like to have another load of laundry done by now, and I'd also love it if the kitchen was tidy, and of course a shower and some clean clothes. Oh, and brushed teeth would be nice! But, I'm here to say that I've gotten some things done. And they are far more productive and more eternal than any of those things I just mentioned.

You see, today I changed diapers... and changed them again. I cooked a hot breakfast for my big boy and packed his lunch and sent him off for the weekend. I've played soccer in the front yard in my pajamas (so sorry neighbors!) and shot some baskets too. I chased down our bassett hound and helped Joshua feed the cat. (we spilled cat food everywhere that had to be swept up!). I sang Happy Birthday to Joshua at the top of my lungs (even though it's not his bday, he just likes it when I sing it) and blew on a naked baby's chubby belly. I breastfed, dressed 2 boys, tied shoes, wiped some tears, laughed REALLY LOUD, corrected and disciplined a few times, and read the same book aloud 3 times. I've made grilled cheese sandwiches for lunch, kissed a couple of boo-boo's, planned a fun dinner for my hubby and girls' arrival tonight, and "delighted" in Joshua playing (maybe I should say blowing) his harmonica all around the house. This is was all before noon.

These things are eternal because they all invest in the hearts of my loved ones. To serve them is an honor.... in my humble opinion, to serve them is the HIGHEST of honors. I am thanking Jesus for the privelege of my role in this family... And while I'm at it, I'll thank him for the spit-up all over my shirt... ok, it's just my pajamas. :)

Hope your day is as blessed as mine!

Remembering Sweet Chrissie

So, it's painful... And I don't really want to go to that painful place... But it is life's reality (life here on earth that is).

Our dear friends the Patterson family who live here in Wimberley had to surrender their precious Chrissie to Jesus on this day 1 year ago.

We love the Pattersons... We grieve with them... We pray God's (and Chrissie's) nearness to them today...

Please read Lorraine's blog: www.allarepreciousinhissight.blogspot.com to learn about this family, their journey, and for ways to honor and remember Chrissie's life.

Pattersons, we love you... There are simply no more words to express our hearts... :(

Mama's Boys

So, it's been a different kind of week around here... :) Troy took the girls to Disney World for a little Daddy/Daughter bonding, so I get the whole week with my boys! We've had a great time together! Dad and the girls flew out early Monday, so I figured the boys and I should start the week off right with some "man food". Here's Tay and Bug grilling us some delicious steak! :) mmm, it was wonderful! Taylor is a great cook! And of course, Bug can do anything that Tay can do. ;)

This is Bug's plate... a meal fit for a king. Of course this little king only ate the olives and craisins out of his salad... Oh well, more for big brother! :)

Today we drove to Fredericksburg and met Gran Ann and Uncle Doug for lunch and a visit to the Nimitz Museum. It appears that this is still one of Taylor's very favorite places on earth. For those who don't know, Taylor is not just an athletic stud... he's also a WWII history nerd. :) Here's Gran Ann and Bug on some kind of weapon???

Again... some kind of weapon that I don't know the name of... Sorry, Taylor's not here for me to ask. But aren't the "models" handsome?!

Gran Ann getting some Titus love... I know I'm biased... but my goodness! Isn't he beautiful?! Sometimes (like now) when I look at him I just cry...

It's official... Titus looks so much like Sir (Troy's daddy). He's the first of our children to favor him so much... but it is amazing how much his eyes look like him. :) I'm glad. Family genetics are a precious gift from God and it's fun to see how those genes pass down through the generations.

So we have a couple of more days before Daddy and the girls get home... Hopefully I'll survive the stinky feet and burping... :) Just kidding. These boys are the light of my life. I couldn't be prouder.

Home happiness, my responsibility!

"Home is the true wife's kingdom. There, first of all places, she must be strong and beautiful. She may touch life outside in many ways, if she can do it without slighting the duties that are hers within her own doors. But if any calls for her service must be declined, they should not be the duties of her home. These are hers, and no other one's. Very largely does the wife hold in her hands, as a sacred trust, the happiness and the highest good of the hearts that nestle there. The best husband - the truest, the noblest, the gentlest, the richest-hearted - cannot make his home happy if his wife be not, in every reasonable sense, a helpmate to him.

In the last analysis, home happiness depends on the wife. Her spirit gives the home its atmosphere. Her hands fashion its beauty. Her heart makes its love. And the end is so worthy, so noble, so divine, that no woman who has been called to be a wife, and has listened to the call, should consider any price to great to pay, to be the light, the joy, the blessing, the inspiration of a home.

Men with fine gifts think it worth while to live to paint a few great pictures which shall be looked at and admired for generations; or to write a few songs which shall sing themselves into the ears and hearts of men. But the woman who makes a sweet, beautiful home, filling it with love and prayer and purity, is doing something better than anything else her hands could find to do beneath the skies."
JR Miller

RAIN!!!

Hurray! It's raining! We're rejoicing today over this answered prayer for rain! I'm loving it partly because it's so beautiful, it cools things off, it replenishes the earth and meets our needs, but also because it's just one of those things that shows God's great power! We've heard thunder, seen lightning, and watched the rain pour out on the parched land. The King glorifies himself in this and I am in awe watching. It's also a good time for homemade soup and some love and snuggling. :) Here's Joshua and Emily watching the rain. About 5 minutes after I took this lightning struck close by and scared us all to death! :0 It's so fun though!!!

The only down side is that it's hard on a little boy to be cooped up in the house while it storms. I drug in and dried off his little basketball goal so he can shoot some hoops in the house. (I know, I'm nuts... but hey, it works!) He and I have also made a giant batch of homemade laundry soap today and some chicken tortilla soup. It's been a pretty productive morning! I'm not gonna lie, it'd be a great day for Mama to catch a nap. :D

Thank you Lord for the rain!!!

Well, it's been a while. And I hate it that I do this, because it's impossible to update all the special things that have happened over the last several months. But here's the highlights- The most exciting is that Mr. Titus Baldwin Robertson joined our family on Decemeber 10th. He weighed 10lbs 10oz and is such a sweet delight to all of us. Joshua has really welcomed him... REALLY. He's only thrown a ball at his face 3 or 4 times. (yikes!) He does seem to really love him though. Maybe he's just excited for Titus to play catch some day! :) Taylor's dream of a 6-man State Championship came true! They won the TCAL div. 2 Championship Game!!! Woohoo! It was so great! We are VERY proud of Taylor.

This is Tay's 18th birthday.... wow! 18 years old!

Gran Ann and Sir drove up for the birthday dinner. We had a great steak and a great night!

Did you know that dinosaurs live in one of my flower pots? I keep taking them out, but every day I find them there again. Hmmm, maybe Eden looked a little like this?

This is Kelley (Tay's girlfriend) and Joshua on prom night.

Here's Tay and Joshua being silly. (imagine that!)

I think that Emily is in love... She and Titus sharing a "cuddle". (new zealand word we love!)

Here's Em and her dad... another "cuddle". Little girls are never to big to sit in their daddy's lap.

Here's beautiful Bai and "Bug" at Bass Pro Shop Headquarters in Springfield, Missouri. We went on a trip there during Spring Break to attend the National Homeschool Basketball Tournament.

Bug an Grandie coloring eggs for Easter.

Here's Joshua and Titus (aka- Tunkey) in their first-ever bath together. I'm sure it's the first of hundreds! :)

Here's a silly little Joshua headed to the swimming pool!

Here's the 2 brothers, sucking the paci's in their football sweaters.

Taylor on his first day of public school (since 3rd grade) with his Batman lunch box. :)

Setting The Record Straight

Ok, I know it's been forever since I've blogged. (again) But it's not for lack of things to say about my family, the Lord, or all that's He's been doing in my heart. I'm not sure anyone will ever even see this, but that's ok... It's what God is speaking to me.

In fact, I've been waiting for the right time to share this exact blog.... titled: "Setting The Record Straight". It's something very serious to me... something I'm very passionate about... and yet, because of that, I've waited to sort through what is "me" and what exactly God would like to communicate through me. So here it is.

I'm setting the record straight about this one particular comment that not only annoys me, but downright grieves my heart. And I KNOW that it grieves my heart because it grieves the very heart of God. Here's the comment... "Wow! All these years after you had your 'planned' family, then you had an accident". Or it sounds like this - Oh, he's the little "oops"! haha. I can't even address this without tears.............. Our sweet Joshua (the absolute DELIGHT of our family) was NOT AN ACCIDENT!!! Not by our standards, nor by the Creator's. Now, I know that often people mean well, and so much is said in haste or ignorance, but that can't keep me from speaking up. The time has come......... and I MUST share the truth.

First, I'll just share our specific testimony regarding this: Years ago, when our sweet Bailey Jo was born we were 24 and 25 years old. I won't lie, it felt a bit overwhelming to be that age (when most of our peers were not even married yet) and we were parenting a 4 year old, a 3 year old, and a newborn. All while Troy was working full time and going to school full time. Life was hard... very hard. There was little money, little time, very little sleep, and a boat load of stress. There was also very little effort on our part to seek God, grow in him, and certainly no effort on our part to actually ASK him what his heart was for our family.

It seemed like the logical thing to do to be finished having children. (*note, be careful of that word "logical"....... God doesn't usually choose that path himself) After all, we had 3, certainly more than the average size American family, and we had girls and a boy. We sure loved them, but didn't it seem logical (uh-oh, there's that word again) to get our feet on the ground... finish degrees, make some money, buy things that we needed and wanted, and for heaven's sake hopefully we'd get some sleep some day?!!!! After all, didn't God give us a brain to reason these things out?!

Well, it only took a few years after Bailey Jo's birth, for the Holy Spirit to begin moving in on our hearts in a strong, more vibrant, and certainly more personal way. We were actively growing in him..... not just going through the "go to church" motions, but seeking him... reading his word, listening to him through the voice of the Body, and REALLY praying and asking for his lead. During this time, Troy was called to minister to youth, and we were slowly but certainly learning that the world's idea (most definitely the American idea) of serving self, being concerned about earthly things, and "getting more" was the COMPLETE opposite of the way of Christ. We were realizing that even within Christian circles, people (including us) set out to make our own plans, live our own lives, and serve ourselves. We'd say things like, "Ok God, here's where I want to go to school, here's the job I want, the spouse I want, and here's how many kids I want...... Now, you come in and bless it all. Ok?" And certainly we can feel better about that by occasionally doing something like a missional project or an extra tithe here and there...But the questions began to mount. Is this way of life that we live, the way that God wants? What does HE care about? Where is HE leading our family? What does it mean to take up a cross and follow him? What does it mean to live counter-culturally? What does it mean to be "of the world, but not in it"? There were many more questions... like, if you took away tradition, what does God want church to look like? What about marriage, children, family? How should we educate our children? And does the Bible actually answer these questions? If I were on an island, with no outside influence - no other family, no church family, no people, no tv, no media, NOTHING BUT THE BIBLE - what would I think about these things? Is there a different conclusion than the typical American way that we've been indoctrinated with? Hmmm...

By no means do I want to suggest that this was all an easy or pleasant time in our hearts. We were being challenged, stretched, and convicted about many areas of our life. Oh, but the sweet grace of God was gentle while he was firm and clear... And he began changing some of our thoughts. Romans 12:2 says, "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - his good, pleasing and perfect will." So, aside from the common lesson of this verse - needing to have our minds transformed - I began to wonder what "the pattern of this world" means. After all, is it possible that this may not be the black and white areas of sin, but rather, patterns that man has set up that really don't reflect God's heart? I do believe there are these areas (Troy calls them gray areas) where the Bible doesn't address something with the power of a 10 commandment, and yet if you look at scripture Genesis to Revelation, God has actually really expressed how he feels about something... and he desire us to know his heart and live it. To do this, we must have our minds renewed. Without a doubt, I would like to be able to "test and approve what God's will is" for my life, especially as wife and mother.

Without 20,000 more words, I'll just say that it was at this place in our hearts, that God revealed to us that he deeply loves us and wants to pour out his blessing over us... And he wants to do that by blessing us with more precious children. There are many, maybe hundreds of scriptures where God renewed our thinking about controlling the size of our family. His heart was to pour out life to bless us. Who were we to say - "no, thank you"? We were forced to ask ourselves - do we or don't we believe his word? For example... Ps. 127 says,"Sons are a heritage from the Lord, children a reward from him. (Is this just the ones we plan and think we can afford or handle, or all children?) Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are sons born in one's youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them. (Does blessed mean blessed?) They will not be put to shame when they contend with their enemies in the gate."

So, all of that to say this 2nd point - Life is from the Creator. He is the Author of Life. He loves Life!!! There is no accident or oops in the creation of life!!!!!!!!!! EVER!!! I think that this notion of "accidents" has creeped into even the Christian's way of thinking because many of us have adopted this idea of using our reasoning and logic and think that the creation of a baby is just something scientific that happens. No sir! Just ask the barren woman who is desperate for a baby if she thinks only science can solve her problem. Just ask those of us who didn't "plan" for a baby, but were overwhelmingly blessed with the unexpected treasure of life. To any person that was ever told (seriously or jokingly) that they were an accident - YOU WERE NOT!!! Jeremiah says that God knew us in our mother's womb..... long before you ever arrived, God himself planned you, and you are no accident. In the name of Jesus, denounce that stupid, ignorant, and Satanic word-curse. You are a blessing. Because God says so.

God blesses in many ways, but it's time we Christians have a revolt about what the world's message is about children. They are seen as unwanted, burdens, expensive, time and energy consumers, and yet that is NOT AT ALL WHAT THE WORD OF GOD SAYS!!!
Before I'm accused of sounding judgemental, please know I am confessing the very things that I was guilty of, things that God has convicted me of, things that were really about my selfishness, my faithlessness, and my need to fit in to the norm. I'm very aware that this wasn't a "one-shot-deal". God has, is, and will keep revealing things to us.... things about his heart that he wants to transplant into us. I have a long way to go to look like Him. The cost is high sometimes... it means being different...but oh, the blessings!!!!!!!! They cannot be translated into words. NOTHING ON THIS EARTH COMPARES TO THE BLESSING OF OUR CHILDREN TO TROY AND I. NOTHING. We are blessed NO MATTER HOW HARD IT SEEMS!

So, almost 2 years ago, I had a tubal-ligation reversal. Within only a couple of months, God filled my womb. (This is no small miracle... something that the Creator does, not a dr.) And now we have precious Joshua and another sweet one on the way. I can't believe that we could have gone our whole lives without knowing the blessing of Joshua. Had we listened to the world's way, we would never have known him. The reality of this grieves me so deeply that I could have - and almost did - pass up this blessing. Thank God for his Spirit's intervention in our hearts and for changing our thinking about family.

Oh God, please let there be less of us and more of you...... no matter the cost. Your ways bring life, joy and peace. Bring it on! :)